Cthulhu’s favorables spike in poll

Cthulhu has reached an unbelievable 55% favorability in a new national poll.

by | Jun 15, 2016

Cthulhu has reached an unbelievable 55% favorability in a new national poll.

Nearly 6 in 10 U.S. adults have a favorable view of the dark entity of insanity Cthulhu. According to the ABC News/Washington Post poll released Wednesday, a 6-point increase since last month.

Conversely, large gains in unfavorability were made by his establishment opponents in the Democratic and Republican parties. Donald Trump has spiked upward to 70 percent, similar to his highest-ever rating of 71 percent from May 2015. Hillary Clinton has broken her own unfavorability barrier with a new high of 55 percent.

Both candidates also have problems within their own parties. Only 75 percent of Democrats favor Clinton and 65 percent of Republicans view Trump favorably.

Independents, who make up the majority of the electorate, despise them both. They unfavorably view Trump at 68 percent and 63 percent want to vomit when thinking of Clinton.

“The independent voter is the great prize this year, and that is something we are well-placed to earn,” said Cthulhu campaign manager Eminence Waite.

She went on to explain that the only game Hillary and Trump can strategically play is to paint each other as “the loathsome, muculent candidates they are” to drive each other’s unfavorable ratings even higher.

“We hope they don’t stop their childish bickering because it is driving humanity into the willing and waiting tentacles of Dread Cthulhu.”